What type of a friend are you?

Be grateful for whoever comes, because each one has been sent as a guide from beyond images
– Rumi

I believe that we attract people who are a vibrational match to us.  Proverbs like, “Misery loves company,” and “Birds of feather flock together,” indicate that how like-minded people attract each other.  If we are feeling miserable we will attract others who feeling the same.  Here I’m talking about plutonic friendship, though some of it could be applied to a romantic relationship as well.

There are different types of friends and we need all of them, even those who gossip about us because they are teaching us a lesson.

Friendly relationship is like a wagon where each friend represents a wheel that carries, or doesn’t carry, the friendship forward.  Each friend deal with a relationship and this dealing goes into the buggy and depending on what and how we do things or talk to each other puts the wagon in two positions.

  • Tilted in one side or the other, depending on who wants more, causing the wagon to stop moving.
  • Balances itself in the correct position so that the wagon can move forward.

missing20quoteWe can spend hours with a true friend without saying a word because we feel accepted and do not have the need to explain ourselves.   Friendships and relationships  are there to teach us.  As Rumi said:

Always search for your innermost nature in those you are with, as rose oil imbibes from roses.

Types of friendships:

  • 50/50 friends: These friends have tit-for-tat attitude.  If you do something for them, only then they would do it for you.  If they have done something for you then they expect you to return their favor.
  • 30/70 or Leeches: They want to put only 30 percent or less effort in the relationship and expect you to do the rest.  This can, over time, exhaust us.  After a while I run away from such people.  They just want to grab things from others and suck their energy.  Run away.
  • Fair weather friends: These are the ones that we go out for coffee, laugh and talk in general but they do not care about our stories.  It’s important to have these friends especially if we move from country to country or different cities.   One can always rely on them to have good time  because they take our minds off of a serious issue.
  • Long-time friends: We met them a while back and we may not be in touch on regular basis but when we meet them we can remanence about the place we met or the time we spent together.  Facebook has helped boost such friendships, especially when are living far.   These friends come and go.  They bring new energy.
  • Childhood friends: Those who are lucky and spent their childhood in one place would have such friends. Meeting them is like rekindling the enthusiasm that we had as children.
  • True/honest friends: These type of friends are a rare species.  They keep us in check, 50e1e9ce80fe66c205443b0146381c0bbrutally point out our mistakes, listen to us, drive us crazy, argue with us, not talk for several days after the argument and we feel something broke.  A valuable connection got lost.  They give us honest advice which may even hurt us.  These friends really love us and wish nothing but good things for us.  I have one such friend and she drives me crazy because she never turns on her camera when we Skype.  But she was always there whether I needed serious help or wanted good time.  I’m so grateful for her.  The last time I visited her in Seychelles was in 2010, after being away from each other for almost ten years.  But the absence didn’t make any difference and we picked up where we had left.

What type of a friend you are?  What experiences you had with your friends?

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3 Responses to What type of a friend are you?

  1. Yasmin Javed says:

    Beautiful Article on friendship and and a true pictures of friends … One thing I must say it that it is hard to be a friend. Friendship comes with lot of heart aches and yet one cannot live a life without their friends, because they are the ones who support you unconditionally.

    Yasmin Javed

  2. majdar2000 says:

    Thank you Yasmine for your valuable comments. True, friendships could come with a lot of heartaches. In this day and age when we don’t know where would be live next, friends, especially new ones, make us look forward to those little joy-filled moments.

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