To me victimhood is like ice cream. It’s yummy when we eat but eating too much ice cream will affect our physical health negatively, and playing victim for too long will damage mental and emotional health . Getting out of victimhood needs practice. So who exactly is a victim? According to dictionary.com a victim is a person who is deceived or cheated by his or her own emotions, ignorance, by the dishonesty of others. Most of us may have been victimized one time or the other and some of us have been victimized over and over again for years or decades. Sometimes even after getting out of the situation we may feel victimized as is explained by The Drama Triangle.
Strategies to help get out of victimhood:
At times we don’t realize that we are victimized and don’t understand what’s happening with us but the realization and Ah Ha moments come if we are willing and open to see what’s going on in our lives.
After realizing that we are being or were victimized we have to immediately think of strategies to come out of the feelings of being a victim, even if we were victimized, for our own mental health.
- Take your power back.
- Take responsibility of allowing others treat you to your disliking. It means that take responsibility for not setting boundaries in a relationship.
- If someone has mistreated us once then by thinking about it over and over again we are punishing ourselves.
- Don’t add all the previous events to the most recent one. In other words deal each incident in isolation.
- Is there a payback for playing a victim?
- Be grateful to the experiences because things, people or experiences and events come to our lives to teach us a lesson.
- What lesson we can learn from a victimizing event?
- Who can you empower by telling your story in a positive way so that it creates a thought process in other person’s mind?
- Lesson learned used in other relationships in order to have positive outcomes so that you are not victimized anymore.
When instead of finding a solution in a situation, we continue to allow others to victimize us or later go over an incident in our mind it means we give our power away to the event or the person.
Share your views:
Do you feel victim from time to time? If so, then please share your strategies you use to get out of that state of mind.